A regular response to my questions about selfishness towards others is, "Well why should I? What have they ever done for me?!" I might point out something they've told me their loved one did for them, but that's often met with a shrug and dismissed.
That type of answer makes me sigh.....heavily.
It saddens me to witness someone taking pleasure as their partner or loved one does more and more things to please or satisfy their needs, knowing full well that they won't be reciprocating their partners selfless act. I gently, but directly encourage them to do just one kind thing, without expectation or an agenda attached, just one, selfless act of kindness.
Resistance is normal at this stage - but I persevere!
When we are in a relationship - any relationship- be it with our children, significant other, friends or in a work setting with colleagues, giving and receiving is the only way to maintain a healthy bond with our fellow man.
See the unity within all of us.
We all appreciate kindness, thoughtfulness and selfless acts - your partner is no different.
You have nothing to lose and everything to gain by hanging up your selfish hat and trying something new.
"Every man must decide whether he will walk in the light of creative altruism or in the darkness of destructive selfishness." - Martin Luther King, Jr.
"Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible." - Tenzin Gyatso, 14th Dalai Lama